Antidotes to resistance and fear

Safety is a basic human need. We all want and need to feel safe in our homes, in our own bodies.

Back in caveman days, staying safe meant battling bears and other wild beasts. Staying alive meant successfully hunting down our dinner, or finding the right berries in the forest – the ones that wouldn’t poison us.

Back then, life was fight or flight. There was no room for anything more than survival. Eat, sleep, survive. Fight the bear, freeze like a deer in the headlights and hope the beast would pass us by, or run for our lives. Rinse, repeat.

We live in a different world now of course. We aren’t fighting lions and tigers and bears. Most of us have food on our tables; food we didn’t have to hunt for, except if you count scanning supermarket shelves or using the search function in your shopping app.

The brain’s role in all this

But our old reptilian brain – the original brain, the Amygdala, located at the base of the skull – is still there. It still operates the same way, ready to come online if we feel unsafe, and kick into fight-flight-freeze mode to keep us alive.

Ideally, we want to be operating from the newest brain in the mix, the prefrontal cortex, which is far more evolved. It’s the brain that governs imagination, innovative solutions, and that gives us our personality. so that we can make decisions from a place of reason rather than fear. But when we feel unsafe, the Amygdala tends to come online.

One of the things that brings the reptilian brain online is change. Because, you see, routine is safe. There is safety in predictability.

The Amygdala likes predictability.

Change, on the other hand: that’s new, that’s unpredictable, that’s out of the comfort zone. Something could go wrong. As far as the Amygdala is concerned, our survival is threatened.

We start perceiving lions and tigers and bears, and what do you know, the reptilian brain comes online again. Then, we make decisions that aren’t rational, and that keep us stuck in primitive animalistic mode. (Because stuck at least means safe.)

There are a whole lot of ways to shift back into operating from the more evolved brain and start making aligned choices once again. Here’s how to make the shift back into the driver’s seat.

First things first

First, you have to notice your state of being. Are you feeling so overwhelmed that you can’t think straight? (Does the above picture pretty much sum it up?)

Have you reached for your favourite numbing solution of choice? A glass of wine, a beer, a cigarette, vaping, chocolate, Netflix? Something else?

Are you stuck in indecision, unable to get a clear read on what you want, or just unable to press go on anything? Are you procrastinating or getting pulled into distractions?

These are all signs that there’s resistance at play, and quite possibly fear underneath it.

Here’s what to do about it

The next step is to calm your nervous system (yeah, I know we’re hearing a lot about this right now – and for good reason). It’s about pulling yourself back from the brink of the abyss, so that you can start thinking clearly and making aligned decisions. Try any and all of these and see what happens…

1. Connect with your senses. Anxiety can’t hang round when your senses are engaged. So make a cup of hot tea and get present with every step of the process. Watch the steam rising. Inhale its scent. Drink it slowly, tasting every sip.

2. Wash it away. Run a hot bath with Epsom salts and essential oils. Or jump under the shower and imagine the water washing your worries away.

3. Bathe in the Sun. Step outside, and stand in the light. Turn your face towards the sunshine, close your eyes, and breathe. Imagine sunlight infusing every cell of your being.

4. Move your body. Dance it out, shake it off, or go for a walk (preferably in nature). Get your life force flowing again. Stuck energy is anxiety’s playground.

5. Write it out. Grab a pen and get those circular thoughts out of your head. There’s alchemy in letting words flow. No editing, no judging — just express and release.

Feeling calmer? Here’s what you can do next

Once you’ve taken the reptilian brain offline, you can start examining what’s really going on. That’s when you’ll stop being hijacked by fear, and you can get back to navigating your life from the driver’s seat.

This is a good point at which to have a conversation with someone you trust; your partner, a friend, a coach or therapist.

It’s also a good time do some more structured journaling. Which is why I’ve created some prompts for you. You’ll find them in this post.

Love,

Tamsin xo

P.S. If you’re stuck in permanent fight-or-flight mode, feeling sharp-edged, jumpy, quick to snap, or struggling with overwhelm, I can help you switch off that heightened state and drop back into calm through somatic tools and practices. Drop me a line if you’d like to learn more, or book a free, 20-minute call so you can start experiencing calm. Book your call here.